I Spit on My Blog!

Been almost 5 months since I posted on this blog...

I Spit on Your Grave (1978)

Calling this rape/revenge film a classic is tough.  I’d be reluctant to even call it a cult classic which is what it became.  Despite being wince-inducing momentarily, it also has that exploitative “can’t look away” aspect.  Rape is no joke and unfortunately happens to many people in reality.  This film contains a gang rape lasting a minimal half-hour in multiple locations in a serene countryside.  It’s the only movie I recall ever causing me to cover my eyes during some of the brutally convincing rape scenes.  This film would certainly make you hate men and allow feminists to believe they’re all like this.  The men in this film are vile scumbags that received their due justice though.  Speaking of feminists, this film would more likely constitute as feminist over misogynist.  The victim does get revenge on her four attackers after all, the standout being the bathtub castration, something real rape victims would only dream of being able to pull off.  I know, I know.  This is only a movie and Camille Keaton was solely in it for the paycheck and moved on to her next project afterwards, but films sometimes should be a cathartic creative outlet.  No, I don’t think it would make real rape victims feel better, but a film like this depicts how truly awful the act is.  No one should ever be raped.  I simply “like” this film for being a gritty, depraved ‘70’s exploitation pic that surprisingly doesn’t make me feel dirty after watching.  Obviously if I saw it more than once!  Proceed with caution if you haven’t already but be prepared for what you’re getting into.  9/7/2017

I Spit on Your Grave (2010)

I’m always leery of remakes, especially if the original doesn’t need improvement.  Just show younger audiences the original I always say!  I actually didn’t mind this remake though.  This movie replaced the gritty quality for a more pristine look (I would hope so if this was made in 2010) which is nice for modern films but the “poorer cinematography” of the original is what made films from that era so distinctive and appealing.  Again, it’s always tough to say you like these movies since the subject matter is rather barbaric despite knowing it’s only a movie with performers.  The rape this time is more psychological than physical but doesn’t lessen its intended impact.  Of course the original had a much more disturbing sexual assault though.  Where this film tops the original is in the creative and very elaborate revenge deaths.  Both films are worth watching if, like me, you don’t mind harrowing yet entertaining movies.  I know that I’m watching a movie with performers and (I’m paraphrasing something I heard before) people watch these films knowing they’re in the safety of their own home (or movie theater) and grateful the atrocities aren’t happening to them.  Statistically, even though I think statistics is a shady analysis, just as many women watch these kinds of movies as men, so I don’t want to hear that only perverted men are who these films are made for.  I’m gay too, so there!  9/7/2017

I Spit on Your Grave 2

Essentially a remake of the remake since it’s a similar scenario, with no connection to the first, happening to a different girl (character and actress).  Said girl is kidnapped, transported from New York to Bulgaria, tied to a bed in a basement, and tortured by a family before being left for dead below the house.  Why can’t villains ever make sure the victim is definitely dead?  There wouldn’t be formulaic movies like this, that’s why!  This is just another lame torture porn/revenge flick.  The torture scenes aren’t disturbing since the premise wore thin and the revenge scenes lack flair minus the “ball squeezing” which has the same cringe-inducing effect as the original bathtub castration.  Predominantly bland and unworthy sequel.  9/7/2017

I Spit on Your Grave III:  Vengeance is Mine

This is actually the sequel to the 2010 remake.  Forget part 2 even happened.  The returning victim played by Sarah Butler (my gay ass is actually attracted to her) reluctantly joins group therapy for other rape victims following her therapist’s advising.  The rapists are slaughtered by Jennifer Hills (Butler) after her friend is sexually assaulted and murdered while the cops “don’t have enough evidence” to do anything about it.  This is essentially a slasher film with the “victims” deserving their comeuppance and, again, could be cathartic for sexual assault victims.  Two brutal instances involve an explicit penis-slicing and an anal pipe penetration.  This is better than the second one but still suffers from sequel-itis.  The open-ended conclusion might negate the entire film too, but I’m not entirely dismissing this entry.  If you’re going to have a marathon, watch all but I Spit on Your Grave 2.  9/7/2017

---Sean O.

Let's go joyriding...three times!

Joy Ride                                                                     

It’s been years but I remember liking it then too.  It’s a fun suspenseful road movie with a Hitcher vibe in that both deal with villains on desert highways.  Instead of a hitchhiker, this film contains a trucker named Rusty Nail doing the terrorizing.  I can’t say I’m a fan of the late pretty boy, Paul Walker, but I don’t dislike him either.  Mr. Walker and Steve Zahn decide to have some fun with a CB radio unknowingly kick-starting Mr. Nail’s wrath.  It could’ve been a tedious movie with Rusty taunting them on the open road the entire time leading to the inevitable showdown, but the confrontation occurs halfway and I liked how it was structured to appear finished.  It’s almost like a sequel was already included and its welcome is never overstayed.  This movie’s entertaining.  I wanted more when it ended if that’s any indication.

Joy Ride 2:  Dead Ahead

Fairly worthy sequel with Rusty Nail (played by a different actor) doling out more “vengeance” on a group of young adults heading to Vegas.  It’s still a road thriller with added bits of Texas Chainsaw Massacre and “torture porn” thrown in.  It’s probably not a good idea to borrow someone’s car when they’re not home, even if you leave your number stating you’ll return it.  At least not if that house and car belong to Mr. Nail.  Again, it could’ve been super lame if they were followed on the highway the entire time, but the crazy trucker makes demands for the victims to accomplish off the road.  Horror sequels are expected to increase the bloodshed.  This sequel slightly follows those rules.  Just make sure you watch the unrated version though; I don’t remember violence (other than implied) in the rated one.  I don’t recall much of any from Joy Ride come to think of it, but it wasn’t needed because the suspense kept me occupied. 

Joy Ride 3:  Road Kill

Rusty Nail, played by another different actor, is back and this time his victims are six young adults heading to a NASCAR-like race.  The red stuff tops the first two combined this time.  Just make sure it’s the unrated version again; I don’t remember the rated version being as bloody.  Some of the violence is superb and the chase sequences are extremely well-shot but, like most threequels, the thrill wears off.  It’s still worth watching though.  This is the first movie I saw with Ben Hollingsworth and I’ve been a fan since.  This was surprisingly my favorite movie of his.  I think celebrity crushes are lame but eye candy is always nice especially if the content is somewhat compelling.  Go figure, I like him but not Paul Walker.  Whatever, different strokes folks.

In conclusion:  All three movies are worthwhile.  All three have a different actor (face mostly obscured anyway) playing Rusty, but their voices all sound similar.  The films successively get worse, but not in the sense you should bypass any.  At one time (and possibly still), the entire series was only $7.50 at Walmart.  Totally worth having a Joy Ride marathon every few years, or weeks/months depending on admiration.  The franchise began to lose steam the third time like most trilogies, so I don’t think Rusty Nail needs to return a 4^th time (different actor or not).  I can’t control these things though.  Much like the iconic boogeymen (Jason, Michael Myers, Chucky, etc.), Rusty inexplicably seems immortal.  So if Joy Ride 4 happens, you know I’ll have to watch it (damn OCD).  For now though, enjoy these three.  4/27/2017

---Sean O.

An Alaskan Tale...times three

Balto

Ah, the good old days of hand-drawn animation.  I still cherish those pre-Millennial days before computers handled animation completely.  This movie begins and ends as live-action with the flashback animated.  Set in Nome, Alaska (an isolated northwestern town) during the 1920’s, it involves the titular half-Husky/half-wolf coming to the rescue during a diphtheria outbreak.  Balto is initially shunned for being half-wolf but once he retrieves the medicine needed for the ailing children, he’s lauded for being a hero.  Therefore, differences don’t prevent heroism.  Balto is adventurous, suspenseful and wondrous to behold.  I’m always amazed at what animators can accomplish.  Not my favorite animated feature but definitely worthy.

Balto II:  Wolf Quest

Not the worst direct-to-video sequel let alone sequel period.  Contains unnecessary singing prevalent in direct-to-video animated sequels but almost as much adventure as its predecessor.  This time one of Balto’s daughters (the only one that looks more wolf) endures the same insecurities he once did of being a mixed breed upon learning of her ancestry.  The ultimate message is that there’s a place in this world for everyone no matter who or what you are.

Balto III:  Wings of Change

Still not terrible considering it’s a second direct-to-video sequel.  Taking place in the late 1920’s during airmail’s infancy, the sled dogs (including Balto’s son) feel like they might be useless once mail is entirely delivered by plane.  A race is set between the pilot and dogs to deliver mail to a nearby town and back to see which delivery method is quicker.  Something happens on the return route and Balto once again saves the day.  The message here would be to retain the old ways as modern advancements are apt to fail as proven here.

In conclusion:  While it may not be the best trilogy, it certainly makes for a decent family marathon.  Luckily it ended at three, unlike The Land Before Time (I never saw a single sequel) or those live-action Air Bud movies and its rip-offs.  I’m not sure whether to tell you to watch these now while it’s cold out and you’re in the comfort of your warm home, or during the summer to “cool” you off.  I personally always thought it was cozier to watch movies set during winter during winter in the comfort of my warm home.  Plus, I was born in Alaska so these movies should resonate with me.  Whatever, I only lived there until I was 2.  1/8/2017

---Sean O.