Pre-Rings

Bad Taste                                                                    G

Peter Jackson.  The man behind the Lord of the Rings trilogy and the Hobbit movies.  Does anyone even know of his filmography before those fantasy epics?  Sure, you might remember The Frighteners, but do you remember before that?  This is his debut about an alien invasion in a small New Zealand town.  The aliens (which are actually pretty gnarly looking despite a few goofy aspects) initially disguise as humans to harvest Earthlings for their flesh to take back to their planet for food.  The aliens eating a bowl of green puke is definitely in bad taste (!) but this gory first-feature from the Academy Award-winning director is lots of fun.  His third feature, Dead Alive, is even gorier than this (in the unrated version) but do (also) check out that wild zombie flick that should be seen at least once.  One word:  Lawnmower.  7/28/2016

---Sean O.

Here There Be Tiger

Burning Bright                                                            VG/E

One of the best natural horror movies that came out less than ten years ago!  Here there be (real) tiger(s), no CGI (according to a featurette, the only CGI regrettably added was saliva coming from the feline’s mouth).  Briana Evigan (whom I love and would definitely fuck if I was straight, I like all of her movies even if they aren’t that great---Sorority Row, S. Darko---solely on her presence) is stuck inside her boarded-up home during a hurricane with her autistic little brother.  A tiger is let loose into the house, for reasons gradually explained, before the front door is nailed shut in time for the storm.  Keeping the majority of the film in one location with two actors works really well.  This film is proof that sometimes simplicity pays off.  Tiger POV shots are creepy and most of the film is suspenseful and realistically frightening.  I felt as if I were in the house the whole time.  This really could happen, most likely with deadlier results.  I’ve seen this about ten times and its never gotten old or less suspenseful.  7/28/2016

---Sean O.

What do you expect with a title like that?

Ticked-Off Trannies with Knives                                 OK/G

The title says it all.  Well, the Ticked-Off Trannies part applies to the whole thing; the with Knives part comes into play during the last 20 minutes (give or take).  Generally a fun movie with some slow and unnecessary parts.  Three trans women are attacked by three straight (transphobic and possibly homophobic) men at a warehouse putting one in a coma.  They eventually have their revenge with the titular weapons and the movie certainly delivers in that regard.  I don’t get turned on by trans peeps but after watching movies like this, I don’t think I ever want to tick one off either.  7/17/2016

---Sean O.

Careful who you pick on!

Elephant                                                                      VG

Loosely based on the Columbine massacre made four years after it happened.  Is it right to like a movie based on such a tragedy?  Probably not, but the media is supposed to be a (slightly skewed) reflection of reality.  Contains several of Gus Van Sant’s signature long takes but fits the scant 80-minutes.  I would’ve liked more stories but I somehow think it was properly approached with unknown actors to depict how ordinary lives can become shattered within seconds.  Powerful.  Deep.  Good stuff.  7/9/2016

---Sean O.

John Hughes, meet George Romero!

Dance of the Dead                                                      G

Zombies are overdone.  This is one of the better post-Millennium entries.  So what sets this apart from the incessant “walking dead” releases?  Like any genre or subgenre, it’s hard to be original.  So with zombie films (arguably any horror film), there has to be good characters, creative kills, effective use of setting, be scary or suspenseful and ultimately how it’s executed.  This movie has all of that.  It begins as a teen movie with interesting characters I wouldn’t mind seeing in a straight comedy.  The dead eventually rise (as a result of the town being next to a power plant?) so various cliques band together to escape and exterminate the “rotters” on the way to prom.  The gory bits and zombie make-up are well-done.  Rock music temporarily saves the day too!  Prom is so overrated.  Skip it and watch this instead, you’ll probably have more fun!  7/6/2016

---Sean O.